Sunday, July 25, 2010

Worth the Weight

Since I do not subscribe to any "diet" in any sense of the word, I instead try to focus on common sense eating and getting plenty of exercise. But in the interest of self preservation there are certain things that I will not let cross my lips, for a variety of reasons. One of those things is Hostess Ho Ho's or their less desirable but still quite tasty counterpart the Little Debbie Swiss Roll. I cannot allow myself to eat either of these due to the infamous Ho Ho incident of 1996. I won't go into details but lets just say it was not pretty. Another thing I will not eat is Jello. As a rule I reject most things of a gelatinous nature. Likewise, I refuse to eat cauliflower - not due to any nutritional questions I may have, in fact I have heard that it is quite lovely- I just don't like it.
On the other hand there are certain things that diet or not one probably shouldn't eat, at least with any amount of regularity. Since I am not, thank Bob, on any sort of diet I am free to eat pretty much anything I want. But since I am also trying to lose weight, I probably shouldn't eat these things as often as I want to. I tend to subscribe to the French theory of all things in moderation and the Food Inc. theory of eating whatever you want as long as you make it yourself.  Some things I am just not willing to give up, even if it does mean dragging out the old cast iron skillet.
So, #1, I am not willing to live without fried chicken. This is definitely not something I would consider eating everyday, well OK, I have considered it but not with any feasibility. I'm also not talking about the kind out of the bucket. While tasty, definitely not worth the weight. I'm talking bring home the chicken, cut it up, let it soak in buttermilk overnight, season it, dredge it, let it rest, heat up the shortening in the cast iron frying pan, fry the chicken, let it rest, eat it with your fingers fried chicken. YUM!
#2, Please do not take away my alcohol. No I am not an alcoholic, far from it. But I live in Kentucky, I like to watch sports - preferably live, I like to play the ponies, I love to have a party, my family comes from a long tradition of bourbon conosiures. There will be drinking.
#3, There will also be chocolate. Don't care about no Hershey bar. I am way to old for that. My weakness is the Bourbon Sea Salt Chocolate Covered Caramels from Ruth Hunt in Mt Sterling, KY. I don't ever want to live in a world where they don't exist.
#4, I am not a vegetarian. I grudgingly respect those that are, but I am an Omnivore. I would totally be carnivorous if it weren't for those pesky fruits and vegetables they tell me I can't live without. So I live with a compromise. I will eat my recommended daily servings of vegetables and fruits. I will lay off the refined carbs and get rid of the trans-fats. I'll eat grilled chicken and fish as much as I can but every now and then I've got to have me a big ol' slightly undercooked juicy hunk of red meat.
#5Cheese. Not Kraft singles, which really isn't even cheese by the way. Not Velveeta - don't even get me started. I like real aged cheddar, smoked cheddar, real Parmesan-reggiano, Maytag blue cheese, a nice caraway Swiss, or an artisanal goat cheese. Just real cheese. That is all.
I guess you can tell that I am a bit of a foodie. That can pose a bit of a problem when trying to lose weight and that sucks. So I suppose that I will never be a size 6 again, but neither am I willing to live on lean cuisine meals and diet soda. No more air puffed cardboard cakes for me. I will eat real food, just slightly less of it, and I will (hopefully) be a happy size 10-12. And I am good with that.

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