Friday, April 30, 2010

Friday Quickie! 4/30/10

Der-by! Der-by! Der-by! That's right, sports fans. It's that time of year again. Time for the "most exciting two minutes in sports!" The Kentucky Derby! The first Saturday in May. The Great Kentucky Showcase. Call it what you want. I call it a good damn time.
No, I don't go to The Derby. Kentuckians don't actually go to The Derby, We get all dressed up and have big ol' parties. We wear big hats and drink bourbon without much julep. We bet on our favorite horses, not so much on the odds, as how much we like the name. And we never ever bet on a non-KY horse.
So I got my dress, I got my hat, I got my Woodford, and now I just have one question. If I'm wearing a great big hat does my butt size go down proportionately? Just sayin'. . .

Thursday, April 29, 2010

Who knew?!?!?!

Today was the day I had set aside for gardening and unlike most things on my to-do list, I actually did it. Most things do get done, eventually. But today was gardening day and gardening I did. It felt good.
I like gardening. It is very soothing and relaxing and I am one of those weird people who likes to play in the dirt. The one thing gardening is not, though, is easy. It is wicked hard work.
There's the bending and pulling, the lifting and digging. And the walking and carrying - good grief, the carrying. But when you're all done you have a beautiful lush green garden to enjoy.
We do enjoy it, too. My family and I are lucky enough to live on a lush hillside in Appalachia. We can look off our back deck and see nothing but the tree tops below us. Seriously, when the Air Force does fly-bys (which they do here often) they are BELOW us. The view from the back of my house is amazing and the view from the front is only slightly less spectacular. So I try to plant things that enhance all the green we got going on here. I plant lots of cool colors in the pots on my deck because they complement the shady area. And by the front porch I plant hot pink to accent my front door. Plus, I have a butt load several shrubs and perennials that need fertilized and mulched and tended. This year I also planted a climbing rose on the side of the house that I thought would look charming growing up the side of my brick house.
Gardening is also one of those activities that allows you time to think. Actually hear your own thoughts instead of mentally making a grocery list or listening for the dryer to ding out of one ear. Today, as I was sweating carrying 40lb bags of mulch, I got to thinking about gardening as exercise.
Now normally, I don't count my household activities as exercise. I just consider it part of my lifestyle. But the kind of gardening I was doing today was definitely not part of my day to day activities. So I hit google when I came inside and found out (by averaging the results of several different sites) that I could be burning up to 289 calories an hour. Holy Crap! Seriously? Since I was out there for about 2 1/2 - 3 hours I figure I burned about 723 calories. YIKES!
So now I'm wondering a couple of things. Like, how many other calories do we neglect to realize we're burning? And, do you think any of my neighbors need their spring gardening work done?

Monday, April 26, 2010

Rainy Days and Mondays Always Get Me Down

Especially when I have stuff to do! To be fair, I usually love the rain. I love the gray skies and the sound that it makes on my window sills. I love how everything seems to be suspended when it rains. I love how everything seems somehow "greener". I imagine what it would be like to live in Ireland.
But, alas, I'm in good ol' KY and I have a ton of stuff to do before the annual  2 week slog-fest road trip with he fam. This year, like every year, we are taking the kids to the lake house in Wisconsin for the week only to turn around and come home and head out to South Carolina two days after we get back. Yes, i know how ridiculous that sounds, and yes, I am a glutton for punishment. But to be honest, the Hubs and I love a road trip. And yes, taking two kids on that many miles can be a bit of a challenge. But we are all about providing them with future fodder with which to complain about us. "Think you've got it bad? My parents once made me and my brother set in the back seat. Together! For 2000 miles. In one summer!" Ahhh, good times.
So, I am looking forward to vacation, always with a wary eye. But for now things have to be done here at Bushwood. BTW, that's what my husband and I have termed our estate little house on the hill. No, we do not think we are that important, but yes, it is from Caddyshack.
Back to the point. I need to plant all my flowers and shrubs and get them well-established before my sister-in-law comes to house sit. She has promised to water said plants but makes no guarantees on the eventual outcome. I, in turn, have promised to bring her back some really good cheese from Wisconsin but make no guarantee about stinkiness of said cheese.
I also need to get my windows washed and the deck power washed. And the basement needs cleaned out and painted. None of this is being helped by this rain that has decided to settle over the Ohio River Valley for the past 5 days.
Oh, and did I mention that I have set the totally unrealistic goal of losing 15 lbs by the end of May. I know it sounds crazy, and it probably is. But I do have some logical thinking behind it. See I have been in a slump for the last two months. That's right, TWO MONTHS! I have gained and lost the same 2-4 pounds over and over again since Valentine's.  But, I think that I have finally busted through and if I can get a bit of a jump-start I could actually reach a pretty impressive number by vacation.
That is to say, if I could actually get outside and do something. Yes, I have my videos and my treadmill and my gym. But to me nothing is s substitute for a good old fashioned walk. I try to walk 3-4 miles a day 3 days a week. (Plus my regular gym workouts) and now that it's nice out I've added to that with hikes at our local State Park. Love me some hiking. It makes me feel athletic and outdoors-y.
So I guess I'll just be hitting the gym harder and riding the treadmill a little longer and watching the forecast to see when I can actually emerge from this cave. Dramatic, I know.  But you don't understand. It's actually raaaainnninng out there.

Friday, April 23, 2010

Friday Quickie!

Today is my son, Jakob's, 7th birthday. Jakob is my "baby" and his sister, Kaity, is 10 1/2 (evidently when you're 10 the 1/2 is very important.)
When I was pregnant with Kait I gained -gasp- 70lbs. But when I was pregnant with Jake I only gained 15, due to the fact that I was sick the ENTIRE time.
My point today is this - I don't think I can call it "pregnancy weight" anymore when my "baby" is 7.
CRAP!

Thursday, April 22, 2010

Fried Chicken Is Not Considered a Quality Source of Protein?

This is not secret as I think I have mentioned it before. I live in the South. Specifically, Kentucky. And unfortunately most (though certainly not all) of the things you think about when you think "South" are rooted in the truth.
Yes, we say things like "y'all" and "fixin' to". Yes, we love us some big ol' hair. You know, the higher the hair, the closer to Jesus. (by the way that's Jesus with a Y - 'Jay-sus') And besides, the bigger your hair is the smaller your butt looks. Trust us, we know. We still say things like "yes, ma'am" and "no, sir" and "please" and "thank you" and no one thinks you're being excessively polite - except Yankees. On the other hand Southerners have perfected the art of the fake polite. You see when a Southern woman dislikes you, you may never know it until it's too late. We'll slop sugar all over you and say things like "How's your momma been doin'?" or "those are just the cutest shoes!" These things are code for "I've got my eye on you, so don't be trying anything". But when you get the ol' "Well, bless your heart.", especially if it comes with a head tilt - It's too late. The best thing to do is politely excuse yourself and seek cover. That woman surely hates you.
That's not to say that all southern women are just a big ol' bunch of bitches, but we can certainly hold our own. No, in fact, you will never have a truer friend.  When your husband has to work away for a while don't be surprised if your yard just magically gets mowed. When your hound dog gets loose, don't worry. Someone will recognize the mutt and send him home. And if someone that you're even vaguely related to should have the misfortune of dying - expect a casserole promptly at dinner time. Which brings me to my point. Food.
Yes, when you thing Southern you think food. No one ever said, "Ummm, going up North to get me some of that good Northern food." That's ridiculous. The South is famous for it's food the world over and so much of our traditions are steeped in food and/or the preparation of it. You've got tailgating and crawfish boils, church suppers and fried chicken, homemade biscuits and sweet tea, bar-b-que and bourbon,iron skillets and julep cups, cornbread stuffing and Sunday at Mamaws. And Bob knows that there ain't nobody can cook like a Southern Mamaw.
My Mamaw Carolyn could whip up the fluffiest melt-in-your mouth biscuits. Ummmm. Biscuits just ain't been the same since she passed. And you cannot convince a Southern Mamaw that you've had enough to eat.
"No thanks, Mamaw. I believe I'm full."
"La, you didn't hardly eat enough to fill up a bird. Come on now and try some of this. This'll fill you up."
And it's your mamaw and you wouldn't dream of talking back to your mamaw. That's just sass.
So what do you do? How is a person supposed to lose weight when so much of our lives are tied up in food. It's easy for someone to say that you just need to focus on activies where food is not the main attraction. But that's just not the way of life around here. And it's not fair to me, or to my family and friends to exclude myself from situations where I know that I'll be tempted. I just need to have a little stronger will power. Make better choices. Realize that yes, I can have a piece of fried chicken, but only one, and no dessert. Or if I want dessert, then I will have just a bite, and no more. That's really what I'm after anyways. The taste. And wouldn't I rather have a 64 calorie beer when I tailgate than to have no beer at all?
So I guess what I'm saying is that life's all about compromises, y'all. You can have you a biscuit as long as you're fixin' to hit the gym afterwards. And certainly having your hair jacked to Jesus is no harm to nobody. And by all means have you a piece of that peach pie, but now don't you be eyeballin' that pecan pie. BTW a crawfish boil is, funnily enough, one southern tradition NOT steeped in fat and calories. It consists of boiling a big bunch of potatoes and corn and smoked sausage. Then boiling the crawfish (or shrimp if you prefer) in a bunch of spices. Then dump it all out on newspaper and enjoy. As long as you avoid too much of the sausage - Laissez les bons temps rouler!

Tuesday, April 20, 2010

Maybe Baby???

No, don't pass out. I said that I was not having any more children and I meant it. The two I have, the wonderful little weirdos, are quite enough - thank you very much. No, I was actually thinking of starting my own from-home business. BabyCakes Custom Cupcakes. Whadaya think?
Yes, I know cupcakes are not by any stretch of the imagination diet food. But I'm not on a diet, anyways. And as far as I'm concerned a cupcake free existance is not a life I'm willing to contemplate. Woman cannot live by lettuce alone! Believe me, I've tried.
Now, hear me out. I want to use all natural and organic ingredients and show that while cupcakes may never be called health food, they don't have to be toxic either. No one should feel guilty about eating a sweet every now and then. After all, kids aren't going to quite having birthday parties, graduations,and school parties. And unfortunately well-meaning friends of brides and new moms are not going to stop throwing showers. I do hate a shower, but that's another story. Suffice it to say that I am all for celebrating milestones, but I will buy you a much nicer gift if I don't have to guess the new babies name and drink flat punch from a paper cup. Just sayin'
So my new business would consist of custom cupcake orders. People could pick them up at my house, meet me in town, or I would even be willing to deliver them to local schools and/or businesses. I don't like to brag, but I can make a cupcake taste or look like just about anything.  I can make the cutest baby shower cupcakes that look like a big nursery full of sleeping babies - ironic, I know. I have versions for every major holiday. And if you have a favorite flavor, I can do that too. A particular favorite is mint julep. Another is root beer float. Just think of the possibilities.
And as for killing my weight loss goals. I don't think so. I'm one of those people that can't look at something the same way after I've worked with it. I once worked at Fazolli's Italian Restaraunt. Yum!, right. Well, it was my job to make the breadsticks. Their famous garlic butter breadsticks. I don't think I have to tell you that it didn't take me very long to become heartily sick of breadsticks. I still can't eat them.
That's not to say that I'm likely to forever swear off cupcakes. It's just that if I am going to spend all day making 3 dozen basketball cupcakes for a local team, I'm not going to be likely to nosh on them.
I'm still not sure. But after much consideration, I think I'm gonna go for it. It has very little investment, virtually no overhead, and it's something that I'm not only good at, but that I actually enjoy.
I'll offer more info as it comes. For now keep your eyes peeled for BabyCakes!

Monday, April 12, 2010

Alive and Kickin'

I'm back, for those that care. And well, those that don't can go to hell. (RIP Dixie Carter). I took a little break from the blog because, well, I wanted to. No I did not take a break from my eating or exercise plans. But I might as well have for all the good it did me. Or didn't do, as the case would be.
Anyways, the long and the short of it is this. I just today broke through a 5 week (no shit- 5 week) plateau. I think 5 weeks counts more as a stall out and I think my trainer kind of did too, 'cause she suggested I get my thyroid checked. And maybe I will, but just not right now. I lost weight this week, bitches, so suck it, thyroid!
It's really amazing when you think about it, that after a weekend such as I just had that any weight at all was lost. I spent the past month tracking what I was eating like a mad person and doubling up on exercise just to see the scale mock me. Finally I get fed up and say F it and go on a weekend pleasure spree at the horse track and, Voila - plateau busted. Maybe that's what my metabolism needed all along. A swift kick in the arse.
Also said weekend has left me with a severe sunburn and a stuffy nose from what the "bubble-headed bleach blond that comes on at 5" tells me is a record breaking year for tree pollen. How very helpful. But whatever. Not gonna slow me down.
I have a Northwoods lakehouse vacation coming up in 6 weeks, followed by a week at the beach with my babies. Then later in the summer Hubby and I will be taking a second honeymoon to mark our 10th wedding anniversary. So, you see, I need to be in shape.
Last summer I had a bit of a problem staying on track. As this summer looms ahead I am determined not to let that happen again. I am going to come up with some sort of plan and - here's where the details get a little sketchy - I'm gonna stick to it. No, seriously!
Hubby has promised me a shopping trip worthy of Clinton Kelly if I can get to my goal weight and I intend to take him up on it. He's gonna be SORRY. he he he. (you can't see me, but I am greedily rubbing my hands together, while practicing my evil smirk)
Oh, and UPDATE! I killed two birds with one stone. I kicked my magazine habit and with the money I'm saving I hired a cleaning lady. I love her! She only comes once every two weeks, but man! She gets more done on that day than I manage to do the other 13. Girl is good!
So, there you have it. Nothing terribly witty or earth-shattering or even very ironic today. Just back in the groove and feeling pretty good.