Tuesday, November 8, 2011

Stress! Who Knew?

I have been seriously stressed for the past few weeks. More than just the normal day to day crap. Completely and totally frazzled to a crisp stressed out of my mind. That's not really like me at all.
For real. If I were any more laid back I'd probably be comatose. It's why I could never really smoke pot. I'm already mellow, man.
Except for about the past week.
It all stems from the fact that we are going to be having Thanksgiving in the Northwoods of Wisconsin this year. About 900 miles from my Eastern Kentucky home.
14 long hours in the car.
With my kids.
Are you feeling me now? I've never driven that far before. Helped to drive, ridden co-pilot plenty of times. But never solo.
Then add in the fact that my brother was supposed to ride with me to help drive, but he couldn't get off work. So I decided to follow my grandparents up. Make a 2 day trip out of it, which I must say sounded pretty dang good. No  Boyd says he can get off work. Maybe. Or at least work from home those couple of days in question. But I've already committed to my grandparents and if he still wants to ride with me he's going to have to come here instead of me picking him up in Louisville along the way. What to do? What to do?
All of this self-inflicted stress has caused the pounds to creep up this week. Like in an almost supernatural way. Like  4 pounds a week. Crazy.
Sooooo. . .
I just let it all go. Really. Just. Let. It. Go.
I wasn't getting anything accomplished by worrying over it. I decided to go w/ my grandparents and if Boyd wants to ride along he's more than welcome. But he's going to have to come here.
I recommitted to my exercise and eating plan and added in a little extra cardio for good measure.
And guess what? It worked. The scale is going back down. Not quite back to where I was a few months ago, but still its headed south.
And that's a start.

Tuesday, November 1, 2011

Here I Go Again (On My Own)

Goin' down the only road I've ever known. . .
OK, enough of that. You can thank me later today when that song is still stuck in your head. You are welcome.
My point, though, is this. A weight loss journey is never over.
Never over.
I so don't want to here that!
When I first started this thing back in 2008 (jeez!) I assumed that I would just work really hard for a relatively little time and when I reached my goal weight I could go back to a normal life. HA! How naive was I?
It took a little while for me to realize that that scenario was, quite simply, not going to happen. It wasn't so much a sudden blow as a slow sinking realization. It ever so gradually came upon me that I was never not going to have to worry about my weight. Talk about soul crushing.
My goals used to be to be able to eat anything I wanted to, to be a certain weight or a certain size. I thought I would be happier if I could shop in certain stores.
I still want to reach goals. But now I'm focused more on the size rather than the number on the scale. And I've created a few new goals for myself. I want to run a 5K (preferably without dying). I want to be able to do the standing spilt in yoga class. And I want to figure out why I feel the need to eat when I'm stressed. I also want to get things in my house a bit more organized, thereby cutting down some of that stress.
And I've made up my mind
I ain't wastin' no more time
Here I go again. . .