Rainy Days and Mondays Always Get Me Down

Especially when I have stuff to do! To be fair, I usually love the rain. I love the gray skies and the sound that it makes on my window sills. I love how everything seems to be suspended when it rains. I love how everything seems somehow "greener". I imagine what it would be like to live in Ireland.
But, alas, I'm in good ol' KY and I have a ton of stuff to do before the annual  2 week slog-fest road trip with he fam. This year, like every year, we are taking the kids to the lake house in Wisconsin for the week only to turn around and come home and head out to South Carolina two days after we get back. Yes, i know how ridiculous that sounds, and yes, I am a glutton for punishment. But to be honest, the Hubs and I love a road trip. And yes, taking two kids on that many miles can be a bit of a challenge. But we are all about providing them with future fodder with which to complain about us. "Think you've got it bad? My parents once made me and my brother set in the back seat. Together! For 2000 miles. In one summer!" Ahhh, good times.
So, I am looking forward to vacation, always with a wary eye. But for now things have to be done here at Bushwood. BTW, that's what my husband and I have termed our estate little house on the hill. No, we do not think we are that important, but yes, it is from Caddyshack.
Back to the point. I need to plant all my flowers and shrubs and get them well-established before my sister-in-law comes to house sit. She has promised to water said plants but makes no guarantees on the eventual outcome. I, in turn, have promised to bring her back some really good cheese from Wisconsin but make no guarantee about stinkiness of said cheese.
I also need to get my windows washed and the deck power washed. And the basement needs cleaned out and painted. None of this is being helped by this rain that has decided to settle over the Ohio River Valley for the past 5 days.
Oh, and did I mention that I have set the totally unrealistic goal of losing 15 lbs by the end of May. I know it sounds crazy, and it probably is. But I do have some logical thinking behind it. See I have been in a slump for the last two months. That's right, TWO MONTHS! I have gained and lost the same 2-4 pounds over and over again since Valentine's.  But, I think that I have finally busted through and if I can get a bit of a jump-start I could actually reach a pretty impressive number by vacation.
That is to say, if I could actually get outside and do something. Yes, I have my videos and my treadmill and my gym. But to me nothing is s substitute for a good old fashioned walk. I try to walk 3-4 miles a day 3 days a week. (Plus my regular gym workouts) and now that it's nice out I've added to that with hikes at our local State Park. Love me some hiking. It makes me feel athletic and outdoors-y.
So I guess I'll just be hitting the gym harder and riding the treadmill a little longer and watching the forecast to see when I can actually emerge from this cave. Dramatic, I know.  But you don't understand. It's actually raaaainnninng out there.

2009 Year In Review

There it goes. Another year in the books. And turns out my grannie really was right. I really shouldn't have been in such a hurry to grow up, time does indeed go faster. I thought that since this was my first whole year in my weight loss hell journey, it might be beneficial to go over my progress. Kind of a performance review, if you will. I don't really have one of those nine-to-fives so I'm not real up to date on the proper procedure for such a thing. But here goes.
On the up-side I've lost 30+ pounds in 2009. Not exactly setting the world on fire, I know, but still respectable and definately more than I've ever been able to lose before. And more importantly I've managed to more or less keep it off.
I'm proud of the fact that I have lost this weight with good old fashioned diet and exercise. And when I say diet, I don't mean any kind of gimmick. For me it has been more of a change in eating habits all together. It took  a while but I seem to have finally found a way to eat in a healthy way that allows me to still eat my favorite foods (within reason) and lose weight. My exercise hasn't been to shabby either. I work out at Curves at least 3 times a week. (I have recently settled on a Mon., Tue., Thur., Fri. schedule). I like the workout Curves gives me because it combines strength training with cardio in an efficiant 30 min. workout that is designed just for women. I also try to get in 30 extra minutes of cardio every day. Some days I'm more successful than others, but I'm trying. I also love DVDs. My favorite is Leslie Sansone's Walk Away the Pounds. I have used this DVD on many a snow day when I couldn't get to the gym.
Something else I'm extremely proud of the fact that -due to said workouts- my arms kind of rock. Yes there's still a little jiggle in the hated bingo-wing area, but there is FINALLY definition. Did you here me, world? I am way over half-way there to sexy arms. Do you have your tickets to the gun show?
And another unexpected, but just as delightful benefit has been that due to my improved eating habits (read: more fruits and vegis, less sugar and fat and white flour. plus a good multi and fish oil caplets) my skin has never been clearer. I mean, I know that we are what we eat and all that, but had I known how dramatically my new lifestyle would effect my appearance, and not just my waist line, I would have gone with it MUCH sooner. Yes, I really am that vain. I mean, I am the girl that never smoked, not so much out of health concerns, but because it causes premature wrinkling and stinky hair. Seriously.
And now for the bad stuff. Yes, I know. But even I couldn't toot my own horn for very long.
The worst is that there have been plenty of times this past year when I could have done better. Not vacations or holidays or anything like that, just everyday old slacking off times that I totally could have done better. Yes, I know setbacks happen and when there is a perfectly good reason for a setback I can accept it a little better. But what I'm talking about is times when I just simply did not do my best. And that pisses me off. It is, as my dad would say, NOT ACCEPTABLE!
And speaking of setbacks, there have been a few.
Summer vaction didn't exactly get me down, but a 3,200 mile, 44 total driving hours, road trip to the great NorthWoods didn't exactly do me any good. For the first thing, I was away from home for 2 1/2 weeks. Away from the gym. Eating out. On the road. Get it? But on the other hand, I managed to squeeze in a decent amount of physical exercise like hiking, walking, and canoeing.
Also this was the year that my husband "Rocked the Stadium of my Heart." (lame, I know, but too cheesy to pass up) We went to the Kentucky State Fair (read: corn dogs and beer) to see Heart and Journey. Awesome show and not too bad as far as food consumption went. I mean, we were at the actual fair for less than 4 hours. Then there was my 30th birthday trip to Oklahoma to see The Black Eyed Peas and U2. That's right, baby, U2!!! Yes the show was AMAZING!!! Thank you, thank you to my wonderful husband for the best birthday gift ever. My ass, however wasn't quite so thankful for the Oklahoma beef steaks and ribs and, well, you get the idea. Not to mention the little French pattisserie located next to our hotel. I know, right,  authentic French pastries in Oklahoma City! I was surprised too.
Then there was the holidays. Cue the ominous theater music here. Technically it wasn't the actuall holidays that did me in. I cruised through Thanksgiving (my favorite holiday) and even amanaged to lose a couple of pounds that week. Then there was Christmas. Cookies and fudge and parties and girls night and family get togethers with three different families and ham and biscuits and bread pudding and egg nog. And through all of that I didn't gain a single pound. True, I definately didn't lose any either, but I didn't gain any. Not one. Shew, what a sigh of relief. Whoa there, not so fast, girl! It happened during the week between Christmas and New Years. I gained 4 lbs. What the hell? Did PMS come early this week, I wondered? Not so much. Nothing more complicated than me letting my guard down. The left-overs got me. Did I mention how much that pisses me off.
So now it's a week later and I've almost lost the holiday weight. Only one more pound to go. The snow is piling up outside right now, but none of it can get me down. If I'm stuck at home, I'll just break out my DVDs and, Oh yeah, Wii Fit. Love that stuff.
I guess I haven't done all that I could have done in the past year, but I think that I have lost a realistic amount of weight living a realistic lifestyle. I mean, sure if I wanted to go all Biggest Loser and eat 1600 calories a day while burning off 6000, then yeah I could totally have lost more weight. I'm confident thought that the weight I have lost will stay off. I know this because of my daily weigh in. Yeah I know what they say. It'll drive you crazy. But I have found it very helpful. I have been able to monitor what works and doesn't work from day to day and I'm able to quickly shave off any extra LBs before it gets out of control. I would like to eventually get to a point when I reach my goal weight where I can weigh myself once a week, but for now I'm OK with being a little OCD.
So, 2009, goodbye. You've been a good one. We had our ups and downs but all in all I can't say too much bad about ya'. And, 2010, how you doin'?

Need Holiday Detox

OK, so I technically knew all the things I was not supposed to do over the holidays. And for the most part I didn't do them. I did not eat/sample everything I baked or cooked. Much. And I tried to include some healthy options in my holiday feasting. Most of the time. I did!

But, it was still the Holidays. That time dreaded by every dieter since the history of, well. . . , dieting. I'm guessing that back in the day when everyone worked from sun-up to sun-down and every morsell of food was made from scratch gaining a bit of weight around the holidays was not that big of a deal. I'm also guessing that a bit of padding was not even neccessarily bad when you had to make that early morning frosty run to the outhouse. But I live in the land of Right Now. In Right Now things have to be done yesterday and because of this weird female frienemy competition I indulge in things must be done beyond perfection. So here I am working my chubby little fingers to the bone preparing things like bourbon balls and bourbon cake and bread pudding w/ hard sauce (are you sensing a theme here?) and ham and biscuits and hash brown casserol and, oh yeah, a stunningly beautiful vegetable tray. And I did all of this THREE TIMES. That's right. I'm insane.
Have you ever seen that movie "Four Christmases" with Reese Witherspoon and Vince Vaughn? Well, my parents are divorced and while my husband's parents are still married they are from 'Up North'. Which creates difficulties every holiday season in that they are poor planners and no one knows what is going on until the last possible minute. Trust me when I say that three more dissimilar families could not be found in a National Lampoon movie. My thinking that having everyone to our house instead of having to lug the kids all over "Hell and half of Georgia" was not as inspired as I thought.
Now I am puffy and bloated and too scared to get on my bathroom scale. I'm thinking I couldn't have actually gained all that much, if any, because I put my regular jeans on (which, if you recall, I was very excited to actually fit into a few months ago) this morning and they fit just fine. But I just feel blah and sluggish, if you know what I mean. I've had a sugar headache for the past two days, or maybe it's the parental pressure (mine and his), or maybe it's just the damn bourbon.

Whatever the deal is or has been, it ends tonight. I have one piece of sauce soaked bread pudding which I intend to thouroghly enjoy in my big fluffy bed after my nice hot bubble bath. This will be my official I Survived Another Holiday celebration. Tomorrow it's back to the gym and a three day kick in the ass eating plan to get me back on track.

My goal for 2010? To make it the last year that I worry about my weight.

It's Beginning to Look a lot Like Sweatpants. . .

Ahhh, the holidays! The wide-eyed sugar plum bliss of every child. Remember when you used to count down the days until Winter Break with big red Xs over the days on your calender? Oh, the joy of waking up on Christmas morning to find that Santa had brought just what you asked for and wrapped it so neatly, too. And all your family came over and there was delicious food and delightful sweets practically flowing like water out of every corner of your house.
Well, yeah, of course we all remember it that way. We were kids. But I bet our mothers don't exactly remember it that way. In fact, now, that I'm a mother I'm amazed that we ever made it through any holiday much less the Queen Mother of all Holidays. That family fueled, cookie fed holiday known in my family as "Oh, crap! It's Christmas!"
Not being a particularly religious family we have always taken a pretty secular view of Christmas and that was certainly stressful enough. I always envied the Christian kids who would say things like, "It's not about the commercialism." and, "Jesus is the reason for the season." To me it just seemed like an easy way of saying, "my mom was too lazy to put up a tree this year." Now, don't get me wrong, I would never make fun of anyone for their beliefs, but not put up a tree? Come on.
In my family Christmas has turned into this crazy unspoken competition (for lack of a better word) where every one (women at least) try to outdo the other women in the family for who can produce the most Rockwellian Christmas.
My one grandmother whose birthday happened to be on Christmas was the cookie master. I have tried for years to master her "simple" butter cookie to no avail. My other grandmother is the decorating diva. She puts up a tree that while small can easily rival any florist's for it glittery coordination of color and theme. My mom, well, mom kind of dropped the ball on the holidays. She loves the flash and the glitter and her house always reminds me of Vegas at Christmas. But me, I feel the mantle of Christmas Greatness heavily upon my shoulders.
I have in my house no less than 5 trees, all themed and decorated with a precision of a military maneuver. My fireplace mantle and banister all drip with greenery and my front door is festooned and welcoming. I always make sure to have sweet treats ready for all our drop-by visitors and in years past I have convinced myself that calories consumed while tasting are not really calories at all.
This year, I know better. More's the pity, because this year is the year of my personal epiphany. I have discovered that all this self induced stress of the holidays has caused me to lose sight of my weight loss goals. Luckily I have caught myself before the lbs. started to creep back up, but still. All that means is that I will still be busy wrapping the perfect present and baking the perfect cookie all while trying to satisfy my stress-induced sweet tooth with a fat free mocha latte.
Whatever, it will all be worth it when my house looks awesome and my cousins all run out to try and out-do my decorations next year. But what they don't know is that next year, I won't care. I will be smokin' hot in Belize. Feliz Navidad!